In fact, the delicacy of the soul and the level of emotional intelligence are also hidden in your five senses.
Cultivating the five senses is also accumulating feng shui. Whether feng shui is good for the rest of your life depends on your five senses.
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ear
Yu Guangzhong once said:
"Good words can win the audience. A good listener can win friends. "
People with high emotional intelligence can not only speak, but also obey.
People who know how to listen are a hundred times stronger than those who can talk.
There is such a story:
Once, a small country sent messengers to a big country to pay tribute to the emperor of the big country and to three little golden statuettes with the same appearance. These three little golden statuettes are exquisite in workmanship, and the emperor can't put them down.
But the messenger has a question: which of the three golden statuettes is the most valuable?
The emperor was puzzled and asked the jeweler to examine it carefully.
But these three statuettes are almost identical in appearance and material. What should we do?
A minister said he had an idea. So the emperor invited him to the main hall.
The minister confidently grasped three straws. He inserted the straw into the ear of the first gold man, and the straw came out of the other ear.
He did the same thing to the second gold man, and the straw came out of his mouth.
When testing the last gold man, the straw fell into the stomach of the third gold man.
The minister said excitedly: the third gold man is the most valuable! The messenger nodded silently.
These three gold people represent the triple realm of obedience:
The first realm: one ear goes in, the other ear goes out, and turns a deaf ear to what others say;
The second realm: listening to other people's words but spreading around unscrupulously, commonly known as big mouth, has become a "megaphone";
The third realm: listening attentively to others' words is for the sake of a really good listener.
But in real life, very few people can reach the third level.
There is an idiom, which is called "chickens talk to ducks". Two completely different creatures speak two different languages, and no one can understand what the other is saying.
It perfectly explains the communication state between people who don't listen.
People who speak fluently and can "vibrate at the same frequency" with anyone are good listeners.
They can understand each other's demands and decipher each other's character through one person's words.
People who know how to listen, even if they cherish words like gold, what they say carries weight, hitting the floor.
And those who don't know how to listen talk like a barrage.
I just want to talk more and take the initiative in words. I don't want to listen to others quietly, and I will eventually be rejected by others.
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mouth
There is a saying in "Augmented Xianwen":
"Right and wrong are only for many openings, and troubles are all due to strength. Life is seventy years old, so how many years do you have? "
Smart people should learn to "pretend to be deaf and dumb" properly: if it's hard to hear, pretend not to hear; If you shouldn't say anything, treat yourself as a mute and hold your breath.
Things, not at will; Words, can't literally. Speaking is the practice of our life.
Your casual words may ruin other people's lives.
In the short film "A Word Ruins a Child's Life", there is an old man whose parents once rejected him when he was young: "You are far behind your brother from beginning to end."
This sentence has been remembered by the old man all his life.
Some people may say, "Isn't it just a sentence that others are angry about? As for remembering so long? "
The old man tells you: as for! In his later years, when he remembered his parents' words, his eyes still filled with tears and his hands kept shaking.
Throughout his life, he can't get out of the harm that this sentence has brought him.
There was also a shocking scene in a store in Thailand. The son is addicted to online games, and the father is angry and says, "Why don't you die?"
The son really shot himself, leaving the regretful father collapsed to the ground.
Chen Zeng, a great literary master, regretted his life for a casual remark.
Once, a young man wrote a letter to Chen and attached his own work.
The young man wants to ask Chen: Is his article well written?
It was a wonderful article. Without much thought, Chen Ye wrote back to tell the young man that your article was good and encouraged him to continue writing.
Encouraged by literary masters, the young people were ecstatic and decided to give up farming and devote themselves to writing.
But decades have passed, and young people have achieved nothing. The greatest achievement is a few tofu articles in tabloids.
When Chen learned of this, he was filled with remorse.
He didn't expect his unintentional reply to ruin a young man's life.
Everyone should learn to speak.
In a high position, you have to keep your mouth shut. Talking casually is not only irresponsible to oneself, but also irresponsible to others.
Shut up, everyone knows this truth, but there are still many people who don't know how to shut up. They always think it will be refreshing to say it.
Lincoln has a good idea about how to shut up. A man asked Lincoln, I hate being alone. What should I do?
Lincoln said, write a letter and scold him as much as you want, and give me the letter when you are finished.
In the letter, the man tried his best to curse the person he hated.
He showed the letter to Lincoln and said, "Can I mail it?"
Lincoln said, are you kidding? Burn it.
What everyone says is like spilled water, which is hard to take back.
Many words are "angry words". When we are angry, we all regret it, but what is done is done, and there is no medicine for regret.
Therefore, those angry words and nonsense are the products of bad emotions. It is better to "burn" them and let them float in the wind.
Knowing the art of speaking is a prerequisite for a better life. Talk less and talk more, and life will be much better.
A wise man knows:
Those who don't argue and disagree with the three views can't be changed by any explanation. In the end, I still suffer.
Talk less. Most mature people talk little. Everything they say goes through the brain.
03
eye
There is a question on Zhihu: What ability is important, but most people are not?
Gao Zan replied: Most people don't have the ability to see.
Many people are surprised by this answer: I am not blind. I have eyes. How can I not see them?
Answer the Lord, the so-called ability to see is the insight of the soul.
Is to feel another person's ability from the little things in life.
And observing words and feelings is more from the cultivation of the mind.
When a person has the ability to "see", he can know what the other person is most important and cares about, and when the other person gets the feedback of being seen, he will really open his heart to communicate with the other person.
When you see others, others feel your respect and love.
Your interpersonal communication will be smooth, and the accumulation of contacts will become your resources.
In those happy families, there are always a few discerning people.
Friend Shen's husband is such a person.
On the surface, Xiao Shen didn't say that she valued her 30th birthday, but her husband saw her thoughtfulness and saved money to go to Japan with her, which she always wanted to go to.
Xiao Shen specially cooked a table of his favorite dishes. As soon as he entered the door, he could smell the food and give her a kiss to thank him.
Compared with many couples who are separated in appearance and relatively silent, they are really immortal couples who only play mobile phones.
In fact, the cold violence that hurts us the most in life is being ignored.
On the other hand, those unhappy people will be more or less ignored:
I tried so hard to improve my grades, but my parents didn't seem to care about me at all and didn't even say a word of encouragement to me.
I have a bad cold and want my boyfriend's concern, but I just want to say "drink more hot water".
That disappointment is really beyond words.
Mature people have discerning eyes.
This is not innate, but a strong emotion after reading Qian Fan.
For the rest of my life, be with people who can "see" you.
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In your five senses, there is the feng shui of your life:
Practice your eyes, and you will have the ability to "see through" your mind;
Practice your ears, know how to listen, and know more about life;
Practice your mouth and shut up, and you will control your emotions.
May you and I have exquisite facial features and rich souls for the rest of my life.