People often say that when people grow up, they will become the kind of people they hate the most. Psychologically, we refuse to be the most annoying person in our hearts.
But why do many of us become the kind of people who hate us most in reality? The reason is that showing your true self in front of others is likely to get hurt.
This truth is just like going to war, instead of going shirtless, we will put on armor and do a good job of protection before going into battle to kill the enemy. In real life, too, if we don't have that armor, maybe we are exposed to the enemy in a 360-degree corner, not that everyone in reality is your enemy.
However, an open gun can stop you, but an open arrow can't stop you from attacking you. There are countless little people in this society, even around us. Maybe we didn't even realize that the modest gentleman around us was a villain. At this time, we can only disguise ourselves. This kind of disguise may sometimes be completely contrary to your inner thoughts, which makes us feel very painful to separate our bodies and minds.
However, we should realize that this is just a protective shell, and our hearts are still the same. In fact, there may not be many people who can really do this, that is, people who can clearly realize that the protective shell and the heart are two States, but they still can't see it completely on the surface, people who still have firm beliefs in their hearts, and people who know the world and are not sophisticated.
The same is true of love relationships. We are often duplicitous. We often do things against our will. We obviously like them, but we don't even admit it ourselves. Why? Because I admit that I am afraid of being rejected, I might as well not admit it, thinking that maybe there is still a half chance that he likes me.
I like her clearly, but I dare not express my love for her clearly, because I think she hates me and I am afraid that she will refuse me, but I really want her to notice me, so I can only bully her. Stay away from her if you like. Keep your distance.
Because I am not confident, I just need to be a passer-by around him. Leave me alone. Leave me alone. If you only look at me, I don't think I deserve it. I don't deserve it I only deserve to wait silently by your side.
Why do you do the opposite? Because we want to protect ourselves, we have to disguise ourselves. Do you hate pretending to be yourself? Yes, then why are you pretending? Because we are afraid of being hurt, and it hurts too much.
So who in this world is completely undisguised? Is what you see really the real him? Maybe everyone is afraid to completely expose their true selves in front of others.
We will become people we hate because we are hurt in interpersonal relationships. We may hug others with a completely exposed true self, but we are stung by thorns on others, so we grow a shell or thorns like others, but we are still ourselves in the shell or thorns. Don't forget this.