Your dream of crawling insects shows that you have always had a strong desire, which cannot be realized for special reasons. As for what this wish is, you can't be sure because you haven't explained your situation in detail. However, it should have nothing to do with work, but with life, with people you can't avoid in ordinary life but have to face and endure. You have a desire for this person. This person should be a female elder and can't be implemented for a long time. Enduring and suppressing this desire will also make you miserable.
This is the general situation. I hope I can help you.