1. Learn Feng Shui when you have time, and occupying a good tomb after your death can make up for the regret of not being able to afford a good house during your lifetime.
2. If you can’t take a step back and the sky will be brighter, then take a few more steps back; if you can’t endure the situation calmly, then take a few more steps.
3. If you like someone, work hard to pursue him, love him, and express your love. Even if you are rejected, hit, or hurt, don’t give up easily. After more than a dozen failures, you will stop.
4. Everyone says I am single. It’s really funny. Aren’t we all the same? Who can have twins? Even Nezha, with three heads and six arms, is just one body!
5. Although the school is very poor, it never hesitates to print examination papers, which deeply moved me.
6. Everyone in high school is issued a name badge. Before a check-up, the head teacher ran to the classroom and shouted loudly, everyone, put on your bras quickly, we are here for check-up...The whole place was silent...
7. Why do you always meet scumbags? Reflect on it. I wonder if it's because I'm too beautiful.
8. I just saw a person who looked very much like you. I ran over like crazy. Then I remembered that you were not in this city. I slowed down and put down the bricks in my hands.
9. What to do if you don’t want to do laundry. Just take a daughter-in-law. If the daughter-in-law is virtuous, she will wash your clothes; if the daughter-in-law is strong, you will learn how to wash clothes.
10. Some people review like Confucius reviewing the past and learning new things; some people review like Nuwa patching up the sky; I review like Columbus discovering the New World.
11. When I was in high school, because it was too hot in the summer, I would put a book under my butt. If the book under my butt felt hot, I would change it to another one. The one on the back table was right. I said: Do you have eyes on your butt? After reading one book, exchange it for another.
12. When I was crossing the road that day, I was thinking about something and didn’t look at the traffic lights. A car suddenly stopped next to me, and then I heard a cordial greeting: What are you busy with, brother? Are you going to be reincarnated?
13. Teacher: You are not active in studying, so why are you so active in dating? You should be as active in studying as chasing a target, and your grades will not be like this. Xiao Ming: Teacher, please be single. Let me see if you chase nine people at once.
14. A new colleague came to the unit today. He greeted me out of courtesy as a newcomer: Hello, my surname is Ma, and the wind blows the grass and looks like cattle and sheep. Damn it! Isn't this a challenge to me, I said: Hello, my surname is Bai, red, orange, yellow, green, blue and purple.
15. My wife asked me: If a female colleague seduce you, would you obey? I smiled and shook my head. Haha, who do you think I am? Am I the kind of person who tells you what I really think?
15. When you see others working so hard, so diligently, and so high-spirited on the road to success, ask yourself, don’t you want to be a stumbling block for them?
Seventeen. The teacher said, students, don’t fall in love early. What you are talking about now will be other people’s wives in the future. When I heard this, I thought, damn, other people’s wives, it’s exciting just thinking about it.
18. An employee bought a cup with the words "I want a salary increase" printed on it. He always pointed these words at the boss during meetings. Finally one day, the boss also bought a cup with "Get Out" written on it!