Two years after graduation, I feel that the whole world is busy getting engaged, getting a license and getting married, and only I am busy following the crowd.
At my age, I will sing softly in your ear, like your body, give you a bag, leaving only mosquitoes.
It's best to show love at noon, because sooner or later there will be retribution.
If you have time to learn Feng Shui, you can make up for the regret that you can't afford a good house before you die.
6. When you are young, don't despair because you have no money, because you have to know that there will be many days when you have no money.
7. Remember, those who look good are called coquetry, and those who look ugly are called wild!
8. If life deceives you, don't be sad, don't be impatient, get used to it after being cheated several times.
9. You changed my religious belief. I used to be an atheist, but after meeting you, I really met a ghost
10. "Why do people like to take off their shirts when they fight in groups?" "If everyone takes off their pants, the atmosphere will be a bit strange."
1 1. Do you feel that someone who doesn't talk to you often suddenly misses you? I'm telling you, it's purely borrowing money.
12. I have a learning heart, but I have a failed life; I have a heart to lose weight, but I live a life of eating goods. Horizontal criticism: I can't help myself.
13. Playing with people who can play well is called playing. Playing with people who can't play well is like working overtime!
14. Why can't it succeed? Because ..... don't make excuses, just because you are so rubbish in all aspects, there are so many reasons.
15. Don't talk nonsense after drinking, don't cry, don't make trouble, don't brag, don't make phone calls, and don't send WeChat indiscriminately. Those who can do these five points, you drink a hairy wine and waste money!
16. I never worry about my son's lifelong events. A man like his father can find such a good wife. What is my son worried about?
17. Seeing others working so hard, so diligent and so energetic on the road to success, ask yourself, don't you want to be a stumbling block to them?
18. I squatted in the toilet today and didn't want to fart for more than ten seconds. A cold voice came from the next room: "Lying in the trough, do you want more paper?" ? Blow dry! "
19. My wife asked me: If a female colleague seduces you, will you listen? I smiled and shook my head, ha ha, who do you take me for? Am I the kind of person who will tell you what you really think?
20. Why do you want to study? For example, when you see the afterglow of the sunset, what comes to your mind is: the sunset and lonely Qi Fei, autumn water and the sky are the same. Instead of: wow! So many birds, so beautiful, so beautiful!
2 1. A man backed up to the side of the road and saw an old man standing next to him. He said, "Grandpa, if you are in trouble, please let me know." Old man: "well, it's the other way around." There was a loud bang, and the old man said, "OK, we hit it."
22. When I was in college, there was a female classmate who had a good relationship with me and was a little ambiguous. She went to the big class in heaven. She confessed to me and whispered to me: Be my prince. When I get excited, I answer directly: OK, Mom.
23. My cousin mailed me ten catties of honey today. When the courier came back, he accidentally fell down and leaked a few drops of honey in his pants. When I got home, my daughter-in-law gave me a lecture: "What do you say? Take off your pants and put them in the washing machine! "
24. I'm a little nervous when I meet my mother-in-law for the first time. My girlfriend told me: Don't be afraid, my mother is a matchmaker and very easy-going. As a result, as soon as I saw my mother-in-law, she said to me, young man, how old are you? Are you dating someone? Ask aunt to introduce you. No ... I petrified in an instant. What convention? ...