1, 14 years old, what a shy flower.
14 years old. I like watching passers-by on the roadside steps, shopping alone with ice cream, sitting in front of the computer in the big T-box and typing on the keyboard, and secretly hiding basic comics under the pillow.
I like to follow the light trail tirelessly to find the so-called dream. I like the subtle illusion that sadness overflows my head.
14 years old. Face the broken world bravely. Put all naked courage on words and enjoy the shuttle between humanity and reason.
Under the hibiscus, the golden shimmer is interlaced with each other, and the scum of youth is rubbing wildly. A messy sunset painting appeared on the looming horizon.
14 years old. Memory is confused by the mottled reality, walking on the bright and dazzling street, but always aimless. The pace began to be heavy and my heart was pounding wildly, but I reached out to seize the lost time but was resolutely isolated by the rainstorm.
14 years old, empty and wanton around. Fog blocked my way home and immersed me in imagination.
2, meet, and then become a believer in love.
You and I both belong to creatures out of darkness. Because we saw each other's shadows in our dreams, we crossed the Naihe Bridge and entered the cycle of fate.
On the surface, we look innocent, but inside, we always stumble forward.
In the time full of lines, we walked from opposite direction to side by side.
A crowded bus, a busy street, a coast embraced by waves. They all smell of our love.
The cloudy sky is clear again, and the foggy glass is crystal clear again. The floating white clouds are smiling, which indicates the next beautiful season.
3, walking, about those who can't keep their fate.
I don't read Annie's books, which may be a bit ridiculous to say. But the truth is true. I have never read her native books, so whenever I see some words and her name appearing in that book, I will have the absurd question of "am I derailed from the world?"
In my impression, who has the most names with her is the word "go", as if there is no purpose and no end. Her girl always wears a yellow cotton skirt and leaves on an old train.
I once read an evaluation about her. It says. Reading Annie's book will make that person feel slight pain, and it will make people awake because of this pain, so that sadness will not paralyze the body.
Large tracts of white covered the road when I came. What we are afraid of is the sadness or loneliness after waking up.
When I am lost, I am looking for the faint light.
He said. You must forget. Forget those who have turned their backs on you.
If so, can I forget you?
Always remember what the teacher said to me. He said. I think you are lonely. I feel sorry for you.
At that time, I always sketched on various materials with a pen, and always walked with my head down on the cracks in the cement road. Always go to school by bike alone. Always fall asleep in the bright light. I'm always afraid that they will leave me.
At that time. Draw a sweet picture on your pure white paper, and then bite the nib and dare not speak. The first thing to do in the bathroom in the morning is to turn on the tap. The sound of running water is flying in my ears, and my fingers are bouncing on the covered floor.
At that time, I always felt panic. Just like being locked in a secret room, the sun is blocked by the hard walls around, and you can't see anything when you shake your hand a few times. The whole dark and gloomy world is overhead. The damp smell spreads around, jumps into the nose and then falls into the throat. Speechless, the cry for help was brutally stifled.
5. Fingertip sand. I counted the time.
I used to feel hypocritical when I saw sad and lonely words, and I stubbornly thought that real sadness was unnecessary to say.
Now I finally understand that some words are not sensational or melodramatic. It's just that the truth is too exposed. When you dare to store a certain amount of food, it will expand until you are tired. At that time, all the resentment locked the throat like a generation. It's irresistible.
A month. In a blink of an eye, I was still standing at the initial intersection waiting for rain, until I crossed the river of time, changed my decadent ideas and faced everything again.
22: 30 every night is depressing. Keep your head down and don't talk in the studio. The chivalrous man has gone home. Keep your mouth shut and go with them. I used to think that friends are accumulated over time. Now I find that time is hopeless, and the way to be a man is more important than it.
6. If possible. I choose to betray my family.
If I decide to go, No one is resistance.
If I say I don't want to see any more arguments about loving you. Will you leave peacefully?
If I say you stop, will you really stop cursing?
If I say I don't want anyone, will it be because I live together as before?
If you always do this. I will choose to betray my family. Turn your back on everything
7. I want to plant a Milan. In the wilderness where sorrow gathers
Deeply understand the limit speed of youth. Only a few seconds, but I turned around and found myself standing at a new starting point.
Always walking on your own one-way street, never considering other people's feelings.
She said. That's what I am.
Always bury your true self in your body, and never open your heart and try to associate with others.
She said. That's what I am.
Live in a fantasy forever, and fix yourself as a fantasy.
She said. That's what I am.
Want to cry, but always endure not to cry.
She said. That's what I am.
Even if someone says he is moaning, it doesn't matter if he is melodramatic.
Me. That's it.
8. Early September and autumn. Lying alone in the garden singing.
I finally understand a sentence these days.
It turns out that loneliness means that no one listens to you when you want to talk, and many people suddenly appear around you when you don't want to talk.
Riding a small tram on a quiet street. Seeing a few classmates who love you walking hand in hand with big schoolbags on their backs, the lacrimal gland will swell violently. Hands clenched unconsciously, legs bent unconsciously.
That's it now.
A movement that seemed normal before will also make the valve save the mouth.
Even a little warmth will make people feel at ease.
As the temperature dropped, the morning breeze became sour and cool overnight.
A huge net line was formed in the darkness, covered with noisy floating light.
Poor words.
This is a word that once scared me. It's like being hollowed out, but everything, the body changes from heavy to ethereal. The oath engraved on the wall by the key is thoroughly washed away by the rain day after day, leaving no trace of reverie. Open the textbook and I can't find the name of walking in Anzixi anymore. Look up and never see the clear figure after the long hibiscus.
Rows of lonely arrangements, dissatisfied with the overall interpretation of strange seasons.
I want to be so proud. Cumin moves forward.
I saw such a sentence in my friend's composition.
This summer, my left foot has been walking. My right foot has been wrestling.
1 year September 08. I fainted during the long-distance running because of anemia.
I have seen others faint, and I have vaguely experienced this feeling in my sleep. Judging from the impression, fainting is not an unpleasant thing. But when I really went through that process, my chest never hurt again. The whole body seems to be firmly bound by heavy shackles and can't move. The coolness began to spread on the gums, covering the head, and then the whole body was randomly strung together. All the pores closed quickly at this moment, and the filth surged out from somewhere.
I clearly remember stumbling out of the team in a strange vision. Buried his face on the railing, his hair became stiff and he couldn't see the contemptuous expression on their faces.
It must be talking. Why can't this man even stand long-distance running?
It must be talking. You can't be faking it
It must be talking. True or false.
I met my former classmate in the corridor. A smile brought her haughty eyes. Even despise.
The warm current of memory collapsed. Loneliness in ruins.
It starts at 7: 30 and lasts until 2 1: 20. Don't leave your seat except at lunch time. Your head is deeply buried on the table, and tears flow down your cheeks to your neck and then to your heart.
One word to describe it is heartbreak.
10, who gave you humble self-esteem? Alone in the sunset.
All you have to do is wake up.
It's like seeing the world through a dense intersection.
It's like looking for a miracle in an empty artistic conception.
After you accidentally fell, no one helped. Nobody asks you to get up on time in the morning. When I went to the bathroom, I found the toothpaste bag crumpled beside the water glass. The clothes that didn't enter the washing machine last time gave off a strong damp smell. White jeans are thrown in every corner of the room. Love you. The tap that was not turned on made a rhythmic tick. The wet water droplets in the pool melted together. The ancient East began to sing a song called Loneliness.
In an empty house. Crazy swing. Through false lines. Self-esteem collapsed in the ruins.
Follow the pace of time. Enjoy the interpretation of sadness.
Who will understand you? Who will take care of you? Who cares about you? Who will protect you?
Is there a friend who will wait anywhere you need and shoot your hypothesis when you cry? Be brave, who will listen to you without complaining when you call in the early morning, and who will tell you that I really like you one day.
Even if we walk together at school and are mistaken for lovers by our classmates, we don't want to deliberately keep our distance from him. Even if our parents say that we don't play with boys very much, we don't want to break up with him. I was called to the office by the teacher and said not to play with people. I said confidently that we are friends. When he knows your troubles, he will take the initiative to tell you not to contact you again and shed tears.
Qing Yan's confidant is like this.
Running hand in hand in the street like a madman, saying that if I have a girlfriend, I will never forget my similar words, and occasionally I will make such a close hug gesture. I won't be jealous when I see him with another girl, Zou Ai. I will rest assured that I need to find a better one. Fantasize that you may be able to keep this relationship with him forever, listen to friends and say that he likes you, and you can laugh and say that we are pure.
1 1, turn around and leave. Cheer up the youth.
The mud wall carefully erected by the sea for the first time, and the name carefully written in the exercise book for the first time; The first time I was anxious because I couldn't find my mother, the first time I went home with my head down because I failed the exam, and the first time I became indifferent; Meet a boy like me for the first time; Walking alone in the sun for the first time, running in the rainstorm for the first time, pretending to smoke in the toilet for the first time, skipping classes for the first time; The first time I saw a cloudy sky in the fog, the first time I died in the light, and the first time I kept walking in the dusk.
I told myself for the first time that everything I saw in this world was just a dream.
Turn around. It will turn to dust.
A depressing melody. Sing all the memories.
Those crazy aquatic plants. Dancing on tiptoe on the brink of destruction.
I want to live like this.
Spacious enough to reach the world, leaving me alone on foot, with countless unsightly fantasies in my heavy luggage.
Moonlight exchanges place to see all the prosperity and beauty, because it is over.
The moonlight sleeps. Watching the world tremble in chaos.
Quietly hidden. Will eventually bloom
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