Ugly women in the workplace: IQ or looks, which is more important?

After the broadcast of "Ugly Woman Invincible", it attracted the attention and curiosity of many viewers, not only the ratings were extremely hot, but also triggered a big debate on "Ugly woman in the workplace, IQ or looks". This originally tacky multiple-choice question has forced women into a dilemma. Women have already worked hard in the workplace. How can they have both? I don't know if we have too little life experience and misunderstood the world, or if we are biased and misunderstood the true meaning of women. In the experience of many professional women, there may be an answer that we can follow. Li Xiaoyu, a 26-year-old civil servant, knew that she was an unattractive ugly duckling when she was a sensible student. At that time, the cultural and recreational activities in the class would not have my share. After going to college, there was a group outing, and almost no boys helped me carry heavy objects. The camera in the hands of boys always flashes at beautiful girls, and my psychology becomes very fragile and sensitive, and I am very afraid that others will call me ugly. When people say who is beautiful, I always hope to change the subject as soon as possible or find an excuse to walk away. Later, my mind was purified in the sea of books, and I had a correct understanding of beauty and ugliness in the process of reading. I began to face the reality frankly, and no longer regarded my looks as all the symbols of my status and dignity among my peers. I firmly believe that no one can compete for the world simply by face. Although my looks can't compare with others, I swear I can't be dwarfed by others in other ways. During my college years, in addition to learning professional courses well, I also learned foreign languages, computers, writing and lectures ... My overall quality has been greatly improved and I have become one of the few talented women in the department. When I graduated, I entered a municipal government office with my comprehensive ability under the severe employment situation. I entered the company with great pride, but once again I was disappointed to find that the world seems to be all men's. Even a beautiful woman seems to be just a vase decorated by the unit. Even if I bring tea and water, I have to find someone with good facial features. As an ugly woman, in this squeezed space for survival and development, if she wants to get a place, she is doomed to pay more than others in her work only by her inner strength. When I first joined the work, the leader didn't know what to arrange for me to do. I remember that the first task I received was proofreading. I proofread thousands of words at a time with the meticulous efforts of ordinary people, which is almost unprecedented. The leader began to have a good impression on me, but I knew that my value was not really reflected. In the following proofreading, I seized the opportunity to gently point out the inappropriate parts of the manuscript to the author and put forward good suggestions. His ugly face has excellent writing skills, so leaders and colleagues began to sit up and take notice of me and arranged for me to make plans, summarize reports, leaders' speeches and other important drafting tasks. Every time I receive a task, as long as the leader gives me a simple instruction, I can do it in one go, and it is difficult to find fault. I often publish some research papers and work newsletters in professional newspapers and periodicals, which is a bit grandiose but convincingly shows my talent. At that time, in our small place, online office and information superhighway were just buzzwords. I used my own computer and network technology to set up my own information website on the free homepage space. The leaders had a good time, allocating funds and buying domain names and equipment. Under my auspices, I have my own website and realized the information office. To this end, our unit has been commended by superiors, and leaders have praised me as a talent on many occasions. My appearance has not affected my communication with my colleagues. Male colleagues seem to be more willing to cooperate with me who is capable and willing to suffer. Because she won't be jealous like a beautiful woman, she has become a good sister of all female colleagues. I quickly integrated into this group and became an active and indispensable part of it. After working for less than three years, he was promoted to a middle-level leader and began to move from the role of working silently behind the scenes to the stage. Although I feel that I am not very successful in my career so far, I have at least succeeded in realizing my psychological transformation, from a girl with sensitive inferiority to a girl with self-esteem, self-confidence and self-improvement. In my opinion, appearance is not everything to a person. Accepting your looks and being ugly is not a failure. The key is to improve and enrich yourself and show your youthful vigor. The talent, temperament and personality charm displayed from the inside out are more valuable and lasting than the beautiful appearance. Don't always try to satisfy everyone's requirements. Zhang is a public relations manager of a foreign trade company. He is 40 years old this year. I never thought that intelligence and looks could be separated. Looks without IQ support are too easy to disappear, and a completely "independent" IQ is unimaginable. Idiots like fairies and ugly talented women are extreme cases. There is no essential difference in appearance between women who are less than 1% and 99%, except that you have more double eyelids than me and my waist is thinner than yours, but these differences can enhance the whole person through connotation. Men like beautiful girls, which is really helpless. I have a male colleague for many years who has never been married until now. I also asked him, why don't you get married when you are almost 40 years old? He said I want to find a good-looking one, but I won't be reconciled if I don't look good. This is very emotional. This man is 40 years old. Everyone must think that he is superficial, but this is a social reality and women must accept it. There is no panacea for ugliness, only to accept and like yourself. Forget about plastic surgery, it's not the same as natural beauty. What's more, the tables have turned, and maybe one day what you hate most suddenly becomes the most popular. When I switched from an actor to a public relations manager, I was often asked: Are you of Malaysian descent? Or ask: your skin is really beautiful. How much did you spend on tanning it? For men's eyes, we should accept their shallowness, but don't blindly follow. Everyone's aesthetic standards are different. When it comes to career, what looks are useless, only by your own brain. No one will sign a contract with you every day just because you are a beautiful woman, unless he recognizes your brand. There are too many beautiful women. How long can we get along just by looking? Looks can get nothing real except superficial vanity. If there is, it must be that this woman is smart enough. For those girls who think that looks hinder their fate, I can only say that their own quality is not enough, and their consciousness affects her judgment. What hinders their fate is not appearance, but self-distrust. The public relations staff of our foreign trade company have some special requirements on appearance. Recruited employees should have at least good facial features, but they don't have to be too beautiful to be suitable. Poor quality will also bring trouble to work. What is generally popular in the work is not those factors of appearance, but those who speak affably and treat others appropriately and generously. In my opinion, the definition of "appearance" is too broad now. Fat people are called plump, and thin people are called slim. Isn't the selection from international supermodel to "super girl" very concerned? You can't satisfy everyone's definition of appearance. Everyone has different congenital conditions. Your appearance, growing environment and the influence of your parents will be the biggest factors in your life, but you can't let these things affect you for a lifetime. You should learn to transcend these factors that limit you. How do topic surveys treat IQ and looks? Respondents (singer, 24 years old), Fang (owner of private enterprise, 38 years old), Yao Ling (doctor, 26 years old) and Wu Yao (manager of trading company, 43 years old) survey 1. What do women care most about when choosing IQ or appearance? Zhao Na: What do people around you think? I choose to be smart because people around me say I have no brains. If people around me call me "too ugly", I definitely want to be beautiful. Fang: My own feelings. The first reaction when making a choice is IQ. This is my feeling for more than 30 years. When I was young, I was often praised by people around me, but until now, I feel that doing business can only rely on IQ. On the emotional road, everyone is equal, and the proud peacock has no meaning. Yao Ling: I mainly care about men. Want to be smart, in order to suffer less in front of men; I want to be beautiful because I am happy when others praise me. Of course, once a woman is old, pleasing anyone is not as comfortable as pleasing herself. Wu Yao: Social recognition. It is impossible for this society to allow pure or ugly talented women to succeed. If so, the former must be a fable, and the latter must make great efforts. Survey 2. How to treat "IQ can be supplemented by the day after tomorrow, and looks are born"? Zhao Na: I don't agree with that. IQ is born, and some people are born smart. Appearance is not innate, and now plastic surgery is so developed that it is easy to become beautiful. Fang: This is indeed a social reality, and you must admit it. However, I think that most men who recognize this sentence are also boys. When they get out of the campus and spend a few years in the society, I believe that when they really want to find a wife to marry, his standards will change. Yao Ling: This is a typical view of men. To put it bluntly, it is superficial! Looks are innate, and IQ is difficult to make up subjectively. No matter how clever a person is, he has to go through "things" to become mature. Beautiful women with smooth sailing have fewer learning opportunities than ordinary people. Wu Yao: I think men are just so average and have greater vanity. Everyone likes beauty. We chat together, of course, to raise the standard. But when a man really chooses, his personality will account for a large proportion. Survey 3. Do men value looks or IQ? Zhao Na: It's hard to say. Among the friends around, some like to be beautiful and some like to be smart, which seems to be irregular. Fang: Personality. Men look at women almost the same as women look at men. At first, everything is fresh, but in the end, the most important thing is definitely personality. Yao Ling: It seems. Being smart is also important, but that's only when you two have time to sit down and talk slowly. Interview or a glance on the main road can make men care about beautiful faces! Wu Yao: Men still value beauty. For example, recruiting employees, outsiders will definitely think this company is good when they see so many beautiful girls in this company. If the company is full of ugly women, people will definitely think that this company is not very good and can only take unwanted people. Song Ping (senior human resources manager of a foreign company): Yes, the world is so cruel to women. You must be beautiful and smart. In other words, these two things are the same thing. Many times, we separate appearance from IQ, which is actually subconsciously to find reasons for not trying hard and excuses for our unsuccessful life, in order to comfort our unbalanced psychology. I'm not as successful as them, just because I'm not beautiful enough-this is the voice of most women. So you can feel at ease not to work hard, stand still, and rely on your ugliness, you can confidently lower your ideal to a higher level. Therefore, even if you have the same body, you can only satisfy temporary vanity. Stupid beauty can't succeed, and beautiful talented women are rare. Counting successful women, which one is not intelligent, but has face; You have to struggle, you can struggle, you have all kinds of customs, you are proficient in eighteen martial arts, and you can change seventy-two times. As a woman, no matter how many depressing faces you have, you can actually find the bright spot of your unique personality. What we need is not a man's approval, but our own approval.