Sketch script "The Eve of the Party"
Location: a certain boys' dormitory
Characters: four students
Boss: Oh, oh, oh, oops.
. Another day passed.
The third child: Everyone in the row slept in class, obsessed with World of Warcraft,
dota
tireless, sent text messages to the arrears, smoked and rubbed anesthesia during the whole meeting , Baijiu
You won’t get drunk after two bottles, skipping classes in groups, long live college life!
Lao Er: Good evening, dear audience friends! I am anxious. I am not afraid that the famous flower will have its owner, but I am afraid that I dare not loosen the soil. If one day
I become a gangster, please tell others that I was innocent...
Boss: Life is so tiring. I feel like falling asleep while standing. I have to line up to get on the bus and eat. No fragrance, very tired in class, cough! There is still a charge for sending a text message
! Brother, give me a break, you're blocking my cell phone signal.
(
Sit down) Hey, it’s still a dormitory and comfortable.
The third child: Brother, I’m feeling greedy today. Should we improve the food?
Second child: Mentally insane lunatics are not scary, but sane lunatics are scary. I just ate an egg fried pancake, no eggs!
The waiter was stunned: If you don’t want eggs, isn’t it just vegetarian pancakes?
Lao San: Yeah.
. old.
. Boss, he bullied me.
Boss: Okay, stop making trouble, are you annoying?
Second Brother: Hey, brother, for that matter, can you guarantee that the Fourth Brother will help us!
!
Boss: If doctors could guarantee to cure the patient’s disease, there would be no deaths in the world!
The third child: What should we do? Besides, the fourth child has helped us so many times. It’s only our fault that we don’t live up to expectations. What if...
Boss: The third child is worrying too much. I didn’t grow up with boiled water, look at me!
The fourth child enters
The fourth child:
My biggest dream is to become a snail,
I have one since I was born. Live in your own room!
But the ideal is very fulfilling
but the reality is very skinny. Life is easy; life is not easy!
!
Dang, Dang, Dang, come in
The fourth child: Shouting, boss, second and third, you are all here!
Boss: The fourth child is back
The fourth child: Well, I just went to the college building to find something.
(Sit down and organize things)
At this time, the fourth child was reading a book, and the three of them were discussing who should go up and tell the fourth child
Boss: Ouch
---
The fourth child is so serious and worthy of being a good role model in our dormitory
-------
Character Good, good at learning, but good at doing things
Tiger, right?
Second child: Yes, yes! That is definitely a flag in our dormitory!
The third child: Yes, that is definitely a lie
The boss: Yes... Well, go ahead, if you want to make trouble, just do things or something, there is no fourth child Absolutely not!
Second child: Oh, isn’t it a bit much!
Boss: Go!
Fourth child:
Okay, okay,
Give me a tall hat as soon as you come in.
Why are you back so early today? How many times have all the members of the House of Representatives been convened?
Boss: It just closed!
Lao Si: Any new instructions?
Second child: I secretly received a text message late last night, saying that there would be a farewell party tonight to send off my junior and senior seniors.
The fourth child: Today (thinking)
The second child: Fourth brother, fourth brother...
The fourth child: Okay, we will become brothers in no time. Oh, you are all stupid now. Why did you go there earlier? Who was it before? You just kept annoying me.
Boss: Second child, why are you so spineless? It’s embarrassing.
(Pull the third child away)
Don’t go too far. Fourth child, something is wrong. It's easy to discuss,
Don't affect the harmony of the dormitory, (gearing) The three of them are together. Fourth: You. . . What do you want to do? Boss: What are you doing? . . Immediately (catch the fourth brother in his hand), fourth brother, my younger brother was not sensible before. I know I was wrong. In order to express my sincerity, I decided to sing a song for you. The second child: Brother, no. . . . . . The third child: Danger. . . . . .
Boss: I am willing to be for you, I am willing to be for you, I am willing to be for you. . . . . . (The second and third children are vomiting) 5 The fourth child: (Suffering a heart attack, staggering to the side of the boss) Big brother, for the sake of the four-year friendship in the dormitory, please spare me. People want money to sing, so you sing. Damn it, why don’t I agree to it? Boss: (turning back to the third and second children) Done, are you convinced?
The second child: Brother, I admire you, your move is too despicable, no, it is too powerful, you are an idol (makes vomiting gesture) The third child: Same. . same. . same. . The second child: Agree (to the third child) The third child: Reason. . . Long live the solution. (Fives) Boss: This time I have to rely on you, Fourth Brother. We brothers are extremely grateful. We will never forget your great kindness to us. Our admiration for you is like the endless stream of a river. . . . . .
The fourth child: Okay, okay, no more fun. Say, what do you want my help with? Boss: (Comment of grievance) Alas, it’s just that we don’t know what to give to the juniors and seniors as a souvenir during the party. . You said, for us, we haven’t always been messing around in college. . . The third child: Yes. . yes. . Yes, it seems that the junior and senior brothers and sisters are about to finish their days. We don’t know what month and day we have to wait? !
Second Brother: What’s the use of talking about this! ! The eldest, the second, and the third: God, what can we give to express our feelings? It all depends on you, the fourth, to come up with the idea! ! ! Boss: If you don’t help us, then we will miss this good commemorative opportunity! The third child: Yes, there will be no good memories if you miss it!
Second child: If you miss it, there is a saying that if you miss it, there will be no village. (With a sad face) Fourth brother. . . The second child found that the fourth child was secretly laughing
The second child: Brother, there is something wrong with the fourth child. He is laughing at us
The oldest child: The fourth child, don’t do this, you can You can’t stay out of it. Lao San: Yes, there is. . . A bit unkind. At this time, the fourth child laughed even crazier.
Second child: Is he crazy? Can we still count on him? The third child: Yes. . A little difficult.
Boss: He smiles so weirdly. Why do I feel like there is some conspiracy? Second child, third child: Yeah. . . . There is a problem. Fourth child: I won’t say much else. . All three people: Why?
Lao Si: Because, I have already figured it out. . Three people: Wow! (Impressed) They say Lao Si is the nicest person! ! What did it come from? What to give? Fourth child: Let’s give something with practical significance. . (Mysterious) Three people: What? Fourth child: (weirdly) Don’t worry yet. . . Three people: What on earth is it?
Lao Si: Let’s send a blessing video. (Proud) Three people: OK. . good. . . (Applause) Fourth child: (quickly pulls out a delicate digital camera from the cabinet) Brothers, here we go, let’s get started. . . The music started, and the four of them entered a relaxed and cheerful video atmosphere.
"Sales Storm" a humorous sketch that took place in a university dormitory
A - Liar Wang Xiaoer B - C's college roommate C - B's college roommate Time: One night Location : College student dormitory A: (A wears a pair of sunglasses and surreptitiously drags a bag of shoes on) Last time we sold a car, this time we sell shoes. We are doing a business without capital. The old shabby car last time... The Giant, which we said was 80% new, was sold for 850 yuan, and after deducting the cost, the net profit was 800 yuan. [A knocks on the door. B: Who is it? A: Guests are arriving! [B opens the door. A: A friend comes from afar. Wouldn’t you like it, classmate? B: Who are you looking for? A: My friend, please be patient. Your face looks like clay and your energy and blood are weak. You must smoke frequently, right? B: Just socialize occasionally. A: Seeing as your mood is dark, you must stay online all night long. B: According to statistics, it’s only five or six times a week. A: Then you must have fallen out of love too. B: It happened several years ago. A: (Shouting loudly) Isn’t it a sequelae of being left behind? You must have dry stools and urinary disorders now. B: (Surprised) I’m a blind person, sir, can you save me? A: It doesn’t matter, just use the formalin produced by our factory for one course of treatment (take out a box of ointment), and you will be guaranteed to be cured of your illness. B: Is it expensive? A: Not expensive. B: Can I drink it now? A: Of course. B: Orally or externally? A: Either way. [C is impatient and stands up. C: Are you finished? A: (Looking at C carefully) Classmate, I see that you are full of youth, with peach blossoms on your face, and you are handsome and unrestrained. You are really a beast among men! B: (smirking) Ha, beast! C: (Suddenly wakes up and glares at A) Well~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`` A: (Realizes something is wrong) He is truly the saint of love among men! C: That’s pretty much it. A: But, what a pity, what a pity. C: (surprised) Oh, what’s a pity? A: It’s a pity that you were bitten by the cryptid, and your life will not be long. C: (touching the wound) It’s impossible, the school doctor said, you’ll be fine after applying the ointment! A: He is trying to comfort you. The cryptid, also known as the Seven-Star Begonia, is extremely poisonous. After being bitten, the meridians will reverse, and the whole body will fester and die within seven weeks.
C: No? B: I heard that Ah San next door has been missing for several days after being bitten. A: I also heard that a rotting body was found in the Jiulong River recently. 11 B: That’s what the newspaper said. How stupid is the body? It's a doom, brother. After I left, my parents asked the eldest brother to take care of my girlfriend~~~~~~~~~~~~~ B: (laughing evilly) Just leave it to me. C: I asked the second eldest brother to take care of it at home. Xiaoqiang (takes out a cockroach from his pocket), I’ll spare you the trouble. B: (disappointed) Just go with peace of mind and remember to contact me more in the future. C: (sobbing) I will. A: Actually, it’s not that serious. If you had died before, (takes out a small bottle), but now you only need to take a course of nitroglycerin produced by our factory, and I guarantee you~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~ [C grabs it and drinks it in one gulp. B: Wait, does he have a license to sell medicine? Does this medicine have any side effects? [C coughs and vomits. A: Actually, I’m here to sell shoes. As the saying goes, “Good shoes mean good appetite. You’ve got it right, Naining brand sports shoes.
B: Isn’t this a toothpaste advertisement? C: Wait, I’ve only heard of Nike and Li-Ning, but not Naining? A: I’m ignorant, isn’t it? Naining is the love child of Nike and Li-Ning. This is The by-products after the merger of the two factories, it takes the essence. B and C: Oh~~~~~~~~~~ A: It removes the dross. B and C: Oh~~~~~~~~~~ A: It Exploiting strengths and avoiding weaknesses is a symbol of beauty and practicality. B and C: Oh~~~~~~~~~~ B: Is this the introduction? A: Of course not. Put on Naining brand sneakers and men will fall in love with you. With tears of jealousy, women will drool with admiration for you. B: So beautiful, so beautiful, exquisite, exquisite. (To C) How about I buy a pair? C: (Quietly) I think this guy is so good. The elephant is not very reliable! B: Well, he saved both of our lives with medicine. Besides, these shoes look pretty good. You should also buy a pair. C: If you want to buy them, I won’t buy them. B: Brother, haven't you been a little tight lately? I bought a car and lost it. A: (Monologue, proudly) I stole it. B: I bought another car and lost it again. A: (Monologue) That was me too. Person C who stole: I haven’t returned the two packs of instant noodles you borrowed from me last time. Person B: Remember. Person A: Oh, I see it’s not easy for you all, so I’ll sell them to you at a low price. . B, C: Cheap price! A: 40 for one pair, I’ll only sell two pairs for 100, and I’ll also give you shoelaces (takes out a shoelace) C: (takes the shoelace) Look, you have a fat head and big ears. Can I believe you? A (angry) You can look down on my person, but you must not look down on my shoes. B: Well, I know you are a noble person just by looking at your shoes. , a pure person, a person who is free from vulgar taste. A: Of course, I am also a scholar. B: I also have an English name. A: My English name is, eh. , (Pretending to be weird) Wang~~~~~Little~~~~~ Second B and C: Isn’t this in Chinese? A: If you still don’t believe me, here is my business card with my complaint on it. Phone number (takes out business card and sends it to B and C) [C hesitates. A: Oh, what’s there to hesitate about? I can buy two pairs of these shoes for 100 yuan and come with shoelaces. Do you think it’s worth it? ? Worth it! That's what you said. C: OK, I bought it. (B and C each took a pair of shoes.) There is no need to send it far away [A, the light is dimmed (voiceover: A few days later)] [The light is on. B: Who was it last time? They asked me to buy shoes. I only wore them for two days and there was a hole in them. C : You only have one hole. I have five holes in my foot. B: What should I do? C: Don’t worry, I still have his complaint phone number. B: How much? I want to file a complaint against him! C: 12315 B: Huh? 12315 B and C: I’m depressed~~~~~~~~~~~ [A takes a badminton racket on stage and knocks on the door. B: Who is it? A: Guests are arriving! B: (opening the door) It turns out to be you. A: Why am I here again? B: Wang Xiaoer, if there is a road to heaven, don’t take it. C: There is no door to hell, so climb in and close the door! B: Let the dogs out! A: (Anxiety brings wisdom) A good dog never bites! I am not Wang Xiaoer. B: Then who are you? A: I am Wang Erxiao. B and C: Why do they look exactly the same? A: That’s my brother. B: That’s fine, then I’ll take the blame on you. A: It’s unfair. My brother didn’t learn well when he was young. He stole chickens when he was young and cattle when he grew up. That’s like me. (To the audience) He only stole tractors when he was young. B: Then tell me clearly, what are you doing here today? A: I’m here to sell badminton rackets.
B: Badminton racket? (To C) Looking for you, brother.
A: This is the Wild Boar brand badminton racket produced by our factory. It is made of pure metal. C: Pure metal? Why is it so light? A: This is the latest space metal discovered by our factory, titanium alloy. C: I have to look carefully. Why is there still tape on it? A: This is because titanium alloy is more susceptible to moisture and it is a protective film. C: Oh, how much is this pair? A: Fixed price, 250 C: I think this is too outrageous! B: Brother, I heard that beauties from the Normal University love heroes, so of course they are good at holding hands. A: There is a saying that goes well, "Lu Bu is among the best, and the wild boar is among the best." With the wild boar brand badminton racket, dominating the badminton world of the Normal University is just around the corner! C: 249, I don’t want one more point. B: What’s the difference between 250 and 249? C: This 250 sounds terrible. B: If I say you are only 250, why don’t you chop him more? A: Okay, deal. [C gives money, A’s business card falls out when he is looking for change, and is picked up by C. C: Wang Xiaoer? It turns out you are still Wang Xiaoer! close the door! B: Let the dogs out! A: Help
"Apply" - a comedy sketch script for 5 people (hilarious)
Characters: 2 examiners, 3 applicants
(a company Recruiting sales manager)
Applicants: Long Min: an agricultural farmer, Tai Youcai: a talented student with no social background, Zhen Quanquan: a son of a government official.
Tai Youcai (backing this hand, walking, raising his head and thinking): Time leaves no one behind, time flies by, and in today’s market, I am here to compete
Zhen Quanquan (in suit and leather shoes, striding forward): According to my investigation, in this increasingly competitive market, it is indeed difficult to find a good job. Comrades, I have also come here to apply for a job in order to survive.
The first examiner said: You are all here to apply. Our company is looking for talents in sales, either with academic qualifications or experience. You are all academically qualified. .
(Suddenly a man in tattered clothes rushed in from outside the door. He ran too fast and almost fell down)
The farmer who rushed in scratched his head and said honestly: Sister, I’m sorry. I'm late
(The deputy examiner was furious): Who is your eldest sister? This girl is only as old as a flower! ! Eh? How could such a person suddenly appear! # Ceba网
(Long Min looked at the examiner in surprise and said): Sister? There are no flowers in my village, only bunches and bunches! (Exaggeratedly, using a hugging posture to describe the abundance of flowers)
(The deputy examiner clenched his fists to suppress his anger and said): Okay. Now start introducing yourself and give your name, address, age, ethnicity, birthday, gender, marital status, and education. . . . Submit it
(Three applicants expressed surprise) (The examiner smiled and said): No need to go so far, just submit your names, education and experience
Zhen Quanquan : That’s about it, otherwise I would have thought we were at the police station!
Tai Youcai: My name is Tai Youcai, from Thailand. I graduated with a master's degree. After being influenced by school culture, tempered by society, and tested by life, I came to your company to apply. I will use my knowledge to promote the company, use my culture to promote it, and bring the world view, values, and concept of honor and disgrace to the overall interests of the company. . . .
Assistant examiner: Stop, stop, wordy, next one! (Tai Youcai adjusted his glasses, raised his head and stepped back)
Zhen Quanquan: My name is Zhen Quanquan, Zhende’s Zhen. I graduated from that H university. Due to the competition in the society, well, right, I came to this company, and then, I wanted to apply for this position. I have finished my words, thank you for copyright Ceba.com
(The examiner in the middle adds his own movements)
Long Min: My name is Long Min, a dragon (the whole audience burst into laughter) I have nothing but rich experience. Please tell me what experience you have. Back to decomposition.
Zhen Quanquan: After all, he is a dragon citizen, and his name is so peasant
Examiner: Okay, okay, let’s start asking questions
Deputy examiner: If a beautiful girl appeared in front of you, how would you promote yourself and make her accept you?
Long Min: Examiner, can you not do it? I already have a daughter-in-law, and I'm afraid that my daughter-in-law won't let me sleep in the bed.
(Angry) Deputy Examiner: Hypothesis, hypothetical do you understand? ! !
Long Min: Assumption, oh.
Tai Youcai: Hey, I feel really sad for the ignorant people.
Tai Youcai: I will recite a very emotional poem to make her surrender to my literary talent
Zhen Quanquan: I will call all the traffic policemen there Where the girl appeared, she shouted loudly: Beautiful girl: I have the right to be honest, I really love you
Long Min: Although I am still afraid, I must seize the opportunity. I will say: Big sister, I can cook. I can do laundry, I can farm, and I can take care of a baby, but I can’t give birth to a baby. Can you help me give birth to a fat baby?
Deputy Examiner: Tai Youcai, do you think a poem can impress that girl? If that's the case, then many old ladies will fall in love with you every day because you say a lot every day. Now go and recite a poem to see if you can get the aunt across from you to accept you.
Deputy examiner: Zhen has the right, you said you can call her All the traffic police will help you. Well, first go to the street alone and find a girl and say loudly that you love her, and see if she will say you are crazy!
Deputy Examiner: Long Min, hey, you’re such a bear and you still want someone else’s girl to give you a baby? Do you think others are your own pigs? Give birth to a child if you want to.
Assistant examiner: Since you are promoting yourself, you should attack the other party as a fortress.
Long Min: Examiner, this is a peaceful era. Where can there be a fortress? If we want to fight against the Japanese fortress now, the strong men in my village will have already picked up hoes. Is it my turn? ?
Deputy Examiner: Hey, you, this is still a hypothesis, a hypothesis! ! Hey, I'm just wondering, Long Min, why did you get admitted as one of our applicants?
Long Min: I have experience (patting his chest, holding his head high, showing pride) #ceba网
Deputy examiner: Do you have experience? Then how come you are so ignorant?
Long Min (expressing grievance): No, I really have experience. Look, I have sold chickens at home, pigs in the village, cows in the countryside, and so on. I have sold blood in the city. Isn’t this all based on experience? Oh, by the way, when I was selling cattle, a young man in his early 20s said to me, uncle, how dare you sell cattle on the road, you are really awesome. The one in the middle with the awesome one, I wondered what it meant. Later, when I was caught by the urban management, the urban management officer said to me, "You are really awesome." I'm still wondering, how come when I buy a cow, it becomes cow ABC?
(The deputy examiner lowered his head and was silent for a while) Then he raised his head and said: I think you can go home and sell blood again
Long Min: Examiner, what you said is wrong. I sell blood in the city, not at home. I don’t have the equipment at home
Deputy examiner: Hey! (Shaking his head)
Examiner: Now, can you seriously talk about how you think you should promote yourself so that the girl can accept you?
Long Min: I think so. . .
Deputy Examiner: Nonsense. If there is no problem, can it be called a problem?
Tai Youcai: I think this question is of great discussion value. If you allow me to call my tutor, I would like to ask.
Examiners: You guys. . . .
Examiner: Why do you think this question is so difficult?
Long Min, Tai is talented, Zhen has the right,: This question is not good {Long Min stood up from the edge of the stage}
The deputy examiner said fiercely: Who is called Long Min? When you get up, go back and squat down
Long Min squatted down dejectedly, holding his head in his hands
Deputy examiner: Why is this problem bad?
(Long Min stood up again and walked to the stage) Long Min said: Examiner, are you willing to sell yourself? Ceba.com
Deputy Examiner: Who told you to sell yourself?
Long Min said: Doesn’t promoting oneself mean selling oneself? Examiner, are you willing to sell yourself?
(The examiner is angry, the other two applicants laugh)
Examiner: Don’t you think you are like a commodity now? Living in this highly competitive environment, there are too many people with academic qualifications and backgrounds. There are more experienced ones. If you can’t sell yourself well, do you think any company will accept you? The examiner just used an analogy. In fact, that girl is the job you are looking for. If you can't get that girl to accept you, it means you can't get the company you are looking for to accept you. In the end, you will still have nothing. Hope you can understand. In fact, we have conducted a detailed investigation on you before you came to our company to apply. We already know something about you, and our company is in need of talents like you. Tai Youcai: with profound academic qualifications, can make a great contribution to the company in persuading customers. Zhen has power, is calm in situations, and is very good at using personal relationships to achieve promotional purposes. Long Min, although you are a bit naive and lack knowledge, I believe that most bosses still like to do business with honest people, and at least they will be honest. So we will temporarily hire the three of you with a trial period of 2 months.
(Long Min, Tai Youcai, Zhen Quanquan was surprised)
Tai Youcai: Sorry, examiner, I think this is too unfair and I believe in my knowledge, so I I hope the four examiners can give us another chance, and we must convince them to hire us
Examiner: Very good, where does Zhen have the right to do so?
Zhen Quanquan: I have never known how to write surrender. I agree with what Tai Youcai said
(The examiner smiled): Well (4 examiners and the first 2 A job applicant looked at Long Min with suspicious eyes)
(Long Min raised his hands in fear): My wife told me when I went out that I should learn more from the people in the city after I came out. You guys listen to my wife's words very much, so I followed the footsteps of the two urban college students in front of me.
(Everyone laughed)
Examiner: Then we will examine three people again at the same time tomorrow. (Applause)
[End]
"Narrator: It is said that the four masters and disciples of Monk Tang went to the West to obtain Buddhist scriptures. On this day, the four masters and disciples crossed the Black Wind Ridge and came to a village. , here the smoke is curling up, as if there is a home, four people are tired from running around, take a rest here... , Another village with dark flowers and bright flowers. "Unknowingly, we came to this Feng Shui treasure land with outstanding people, where people live in small bridges and flowing water, and the ancient road is full of westerly wind and thin horses. Kongkong, I'm hungry. Let's go find some fast food.
Wukong: Master, aren’t you losing weight? Those fat-burning years cost us a lot of money!
Tang Seng: Stupid monkey, how can you lose weight if you don’t eat enough!
Wukong: Okay, Master, I’ll come as soon as I go, Bajie, Junior Brother Sha, take care of our teacher Tang!
Tang Monk: Bajie, what bird is that monkey talking about? Language! ?
Bajie: Master, that monkey saw that I passed CET-4 and felt unbalanced, so he worked day and night to surpass me.
Tang Seng: Oh, it turns out to be ENGLISH, hey! Bajie, is there a wonder girl over there?
Bajie: Master, it’s true, she’s so beautiful.
Tang Monk: Pig, Bajie, you have lost your composure again. Pay attention to the image of your pig. Although she is not ugly, she is not obviously beautiful either.
Bai Jing: I want nobody nobody, but you! I want nobody nobody, but you!
Sha Seng: STOP, hello girl, how old are you and what is your name? , where are you coming from, where are you going, how many followers are there in your family, do you know there are many monsters along the way, but hey, hey, I will protect you.
Bai Jing: This little monk is so polite. The little girl’s surname is Bai and her name is Jingjing.
Wukong: What kind of monster dares to disturb my master? It turns out to be Jingjing.
Bai Jing: Kongkong, is that you?
Wukong: Jingjing, is it really you?
Tang Seng: OH MY LADYGAGA, so touching. I have never seen such a touching scene since I read the story of JAKE and ROSE (covering her face and crying)
Drifting Monk: Master, don't make people laugh, that's "Titanic"
Tang Seng: Oh, I forgot to go out and took medicine, my memory is a lot worse!
Bajie: Senior brother, what’s going on with the horse?
Wukong: (Make a look of admiration) That year when I was a freshman, I was the study committee member and Jingjing was the art committee member. I had no intention of being different, but my taste was outstanding. In the end, Jingjing chose me. But I rejected her.
Bai Jing: Yes, there are times in life when there is love, and I can choose to give up, but I cannot give up the choice. Empty, if we go back in time, can we start all over again?
Wukong; No, OK! There is no opportunity to rehearse in life. Every moment is a live broadcast, such as now... Got it!
Sha Seng: Alas! The saddest thing in life is that you have passed her countless times, your clothes were all torn, and there were no sparks, and you had no choice but to go your separate ways.
Bajie: Why aren’t you together?
Bai Jing: He said he is going to take the postgraduate entrance examination, and I don’t want to worry about her future
Bajie: Oh, ah, no, Brother Monkey, you are not a human being, then Miss Bai She,,, (pretending to be scared)
Tang’s Monk: Beast, no, monster, hit her quickly.
Bai Jing: Don’t be nervous. I’m not a good person. I’m not here to eat your master. I just want to tell you that there is someone in this world who misses you forever. Since you are devoted to I can’t stand in the way of pursuing progress towards Buddha.
Tang Seng: Remember that day, God arranged for you to meet (sing, this is a song "That Day"). Many people fell in love with the wrong person because of loneliness, but more people, because Falling in love with the wrong person leads to a lifetime of loneliness.
Wukong: Jingjing, that night, you didn’t reject me, that night, I hurt you. You said you liked me, but actually..., actually, at first, well, let me tell you, I actually like myself quite a lot.
Bai Jing: Do you know that God is unfair? You can choose to love me or not, but I can only choose to love you or love you more. I miss you for a long time, I hate you for a long time, and my hatred will not stop until I return. The moon is bright and people are leaning on the building, which is empty. It has been five hundred years. Do you really miss me at all?
Bajie: Now my senior brother is escorting my master to obtain scriptures. If you think about the old love, don’t miss me anymore. It’s hard for him.
Drifter: Time has passed, and Senior Brother is no longer the same person. Your old ticket can no longer board his broken ship.
Tang Monk: Wukong, you formatted yourself to delete her!
Wukong: At this point, do you choose to leave on your own, or do you choose for me to beat you away?
Bai Jing: Alas! If I am no longer lonely, who will accompany me? Why did you give me two choices, but the same ending? Why do passionate people always get hurt ruthlessly?
Qi: In fact, this is love, and it is inherently unfair.
(Singing, Zhang Liangying)
Tang Seng: I miss you all the time, I forget you easily, I am a stranger without knowing it.
Bajie: If our love lasts for a long time, how can we stay together day and night? Miss Bai, you are also a fallen person in the world, and you are still falling in the world. Why don't you come with me? I will make you happy! (Go up and wipe off the oil)
Bai Jing: Let go, believe it or not, I slap you against the wall and you can’t even dig it out! I have seen ugly people, but I have never seen anyone as ugly as you. At first glance, it looks ugly. But upon closer inspection, it is indeed ugly. Your appearance has exceeded the limit of a pig. I despise you!
Bajie: There are so many people who despise me, who are you? My heart illuminates the moon, and the bright moon illuminates the canal. Then why did you smile at me just now?
Bai Jing: I am not the Mona Lisa, and I will not smile at everyone. What's more, smiling at you is purely polite.
Tang Seng: Let go, don’t be obsessed with Jingjing, Jingjing will only make you sad. She is not L'Oreal Paris, you don't deserve it. Even if you stand in the sun, your shadow will be black.
Sha Seng: Second Senior Brother, there is a kind of love called letting go. Just wait patiently. As long as you meet a pineapple, salt can also produce a sweet taste.
Wukong: Bajie, don’t be sad, even a piece of shit will encounter a dung beetle one day. You don’t have to worry about who you are today!
Bai Jing: Asking what love is in the world, I only teach you how to make love between life and death. I'm leaving...
Wukong: Jingjing, there's no need to cry. Tears are the gift you mailed to me, but the address is not very happy. It's okay, just go back and get some regret medicine prescribed by the doctor, mix it with the love-forgetting water and drink it.
Tang Monk: Su Shi told me that technically there are few willow trees and there are no fragrant grasses anywhere in the world. Disciples, when you choose the cassock, you are destined to give up the wedding dress. Love is something you encounter unexpectedly. You can expect it, but you can’t create it. The more lonely you are, the more you need to be wary of love! Life is truly precious, but love is even more valuable. If you want to learn from it, you can throw away both! You have achieved great enlightenment, Amitabha.
Qi: Amitabha!