In reality, some married daughters want to have a confinement at their parents' home because they have a bad relationship with their mother-in-law. But in our traditional concept, a daughter can't be kept in her family, which is said to lead to bad luck for her family.
Is this statement superstitious or has some truth? Let's have a look!
My cousin in my hometown gave birth to a child soon after she married her husband. But because she didn't work in one place, her cousin went back to her mother's house and raised a baby. It's just that one month before labor, my mother must let my cousin move back to her husband's house, otherwise she won't take care of her and won't take her grandchildren in the future. No way, my cousin gave in and had to move to her husband's house with big and small things.
Later, my cousin learned that my mother thought that confinement at home would affect my family's luck, but my cousin always had bad feelings and felt that she was thrown out by her married daughter and abandoned by her family.
No matter what my cousin thinks, as far as this matter is concerned, it is reasonable for my daughter not to be confined at home, and it is not completely superstitious.
Let's see what's wrong with confinement at home.
1, which easily leads to family conflicts.
For the husband-in-law's family, the wife is one of us when she marries the door. It is also a good thing for a wife to have a baby, so her husband's family is very happy to have a baby at home, because she has also contributed to the family.
If the daughter-in-law insists on going to her mother's house for confinement, it may cause unhappiness in her husband's family and make some people around her gossip.
For the bride's family, a woman is married and comes back as a guest. At this time, if the brothers at home are not married and have children, if they already have a sister-in-law or a sister-in-law, it is always bad for their daughters to live in other people's homes.
Moreover, the newborn baby often cries, and other trivial matters will also cause certain interference to her family's life. So if the relationship with her husband's family is ok, it's better to go to her husband's family for confinement.
2. It is inconvenient for the husband to take care of the mother and children.
A woman is confinement, in fact, it is her husband who should take care of her most. Because children are the crystallization of their love, taking care of children is the obligation that husbands should do. What's more, at this time, the wife is the weakest and most in need of care. However, if the wife chooses to have a confinement in her mother's home, it will inevitably cause a lot of inconvenience if the husband goes with her.
On the one hand, I live in my mother-in-law's house, but I don't live in my own house, so I can't tell my mother-in-law anything. If it's for your mother, it's different. If the mother-in-law's family is not very well-off, it's uncomfortable for the family to be crowded together.
3. It is inconvenient to run on both sides.
In many areas, it is customary to drink full moon wine. If the daughter is locked up in her parents' house, she will go to her husband's house for a banquet at the full moon, and the two families can live closer together. If they are far away, it is not good for babies and mothers to travel long distances.
In addition, I will go back to the hospital for physical examination 42 days after delivery. It was really difficult to come back from my husband's house at that time.
In fact, confinement, whether in her husband's family or her family, is not as good as her own small family. You are most comfortable in your own home. If you don't like your mother-in-law to take care of herself, you can invite your mother to take care of the confinement. In case of good economic situation, you can ask for a month's help.