"people who are not interested" and "people who are interested"
Have you ever found that in the workplace and life. Some people we call "uninterested". People who are not interested never seem to have any special hobbies or specialties. It's all so-so People who are not interested in work have little passion. After working for four or five years, they have done much the same thing as before. Ask him why, and he will tell you: What can you do if you don't work like this?
Others (let's just call them "interested people") seem to be interested in everything, as if they are just born every day, full of enthusiasm and curiosity; In life, they are also proficient in everything: photography, writing, dancing, music and sports ... these people are the darlings of heaven, as good as the male and female protagonists who have just come out of Korean dramas. We often hear people say to "interested people", "You are great! How can you possibly know everything? "
Why is heaven so unfair? Some people have inexhaustible energy and curiosity, and everything is excellent. I am not interested in anything. I can't do anything well. Maybe the following story will lead you to the answer. .
On Sunday, when you were traveling in the suburbs, you came to a fork in the road without a street sign. Only one can reach the canyon you want to go to, and the other two lead to unknown places. It's noon, there's plenty of time, and you have enough food and water. How will you go?
Xiao Ming and Xiao Qiang arrived at this crossroads at different times, and they both encountered this problem.
Xiao Qiang decided to give it a try. He thought that even if he took the wrong road, it would be better than staying. He walked quickly forward. An hour later, he had to step back and start over. But Xiao Qiang was very happy. He told his friends about the beautiful scenery he saw on the road with great interest. Maybe they can go there next time. After all this, Xiao Qiang began to try the second method. He sang and danced all the way.
Xiao Ming thinks that there is a 2/3 chance to leave and there will be no gain. I might as well stay here if there is no definite chance. Maybe someone who knows the way will pass by and tell me the exact answer. Xiao Ming waited until it was very late, and then he felt he had to go, but what if he went the wrong way? He walked slowly forward, thinking about getting lost all the time ... Finally, three hours later, he saw the end of a road stopped by a river.
"God, I should have thought of this! Don't come if you don't know the way! " Xiao Ming is very depressed. He sits down by the river. He didn't even have the courage to go back. ...
A month later, Xiao Qiang and Xiaoming met at a party. Xiao Qiang is telling their friends about his "most wonderful travel experience". Xiaoming heard that it was the one he had been to. "You are talking nonsense. This is the wrong road, and it's not fun at all. There is only one big river blocking the road. Boring. " Xiao Ming said.
"No way?" Xiao Qiang said, "Didn't you see those egrets and lotus flowers in the middle of the river?" This is the most beautiful mistake I have ever made. "
Xiao Ming shrugged. "Now that you mention it ... it seems there is, but I'm not interested."
Who is like you in this story?
We are surrounded by Xiao Ming who is not interested and Xiao Qiang who is interested. Xiao Ming is always keen on adventure after adventure. They have experienced a lot, gained a lot, and of course failed more. On the other hand, Xiao Qiang is always uninterested in everything. Only when he had to take action were they forced to complain about entering. They seldom fail and seldom try, because they think it is meaningless.
Interesting mode and boring mode
What's the difference between "interesting" people and "boring" people?
Let's take a look at what interest is first.
Interest comes from the Latin root "between", followed by "est" representing the superlative and "ing" representing the present. This seems to tell us that when you throw yourself into the present (ing) in the form of the highest level (est), you go to the inter. Interest is completely immersed in things. When you really devote yourself to the present, no matter how simple and humble, you can feel endless fun. Any yoga instructor will tell you that even if you take breathing seriously-you have to do countless things every day-you can feel countless fun.
Zen Buddhism also has a story about piety:
Active lawyer: "Monks practice, do you still study hard?"
Dazhu Huihai: "Study hard."
Active lawyer: "How to study hard?"
Dazhu Huihai: "Eat when you are hungry and sleep when you are sleepy."
Active lawyer: "Have you always been a teacher?"
Dazhu Huihai: "It's different."
Active lawyer: "Why is it different?"
Hui Dazhu Huihai: "He refused to eat when he was eating, and asked for a hundred things. He refuses to sleep, so he cares about everything, so it's different. "
Eating and drinking while drinking water is practice. Unfortunately, most people don't know. When we eat, we think about work, when we drink water, we think about eating, when we work, we think about making mistakes, and when we are in love, you worry about breaking up. You were still looking at your watch when you hugged. ...
So we're still human.
In the past few years, I have met many people. Their questions are: "I don't know what I'm interested in" or "I seem to be interested in everything". But if you ask them and hear that you like this market so much, why not give it a try? They will answer, "What if it fails?"
You know what their problem is. These people are "uninterested people" who dare not invest, that is to say, they never seem to want to enter the present and never feel fun. They always think, "What's the use of reading this book?" "What if I can't do it well?" This makes them unable to have fun from anything, and naturally they cannot be interested in anything. The wall of worry will always separate you from fun. You are like a bad reader. Every time you read a novel, you have to turn to the end to see the ending, then you completely lose the pleasure of reading.
So now the investment brings happiness. The following is an experience of mine:
Once at dinner, I learned a close-up magic of rubber bands from a friend. I thought it was interesting, so I began to study on the spot. At first, I was the most clumsy one, either wearing a belt or flying a rubber band into the bowl of the next door. Everyone watched my performance and said, "You are not performing magic, but revealing the secret of magic." Others said, "You think you are Liu Qian!"
But I still find it interesting. On the way home, I did this magic trick with my hands while driving. I downloaded all the videos of Liu Qian on Youku, explaining frame by frame how he changed his fingers, misled the audience and made moves. As soon as I have a chance to attend class, I will show it to people around me. Of course, some are magic shows, and some are magic revealing performances. A week later, I successfully performed this magic. Even in the face of the people who studied magic with me that day, everyone clearly knew that I was changing hands, but I just couldn't say it!
What did I get? My harvest is that I can do magic tricks during recess to make everyone happy, and I can also use them to coax my wife at home. More importantly, I began to look for another way to make myself happy. I think I am also very talented in magic! This boosted my confidence.
So fun comes from input, not the result of input. It is precisely because of this that funding can be unconditional.
The baby giggles when playing, not because the game will bring him anything. We feel happy when playing musical instruments, not because we have won the tenth grade of piano through this. We laughed when listening to a joke, not because we wanted to record it and show it to others; When we read a novel, we yearn for it, not because it can relieve my stress.
Because happiness is happiness, and the happiness of investment is unconditional.
Now we have the following understanding of input;
1. This attempt may succeed or fail.
2. A successful attempt can produce results.
3. unsuccessful attempts can gain wisdom.
4. Whether it is successful or not, devotion can bring happiness.
In that case, why don't you stop worrying about the consequences and put in some?
Loyal people:
In our life dynamics course, a student shared her experience in the New Oriental children's teacher class. She realized an interesting person.
Maggie impressed me the most during the four months I studied English in the kindergarten teacher class. She's not like us. Most of us just graduated a few years ago and want to find a job to support ourselves as soon as we finish our studies. Maggie, it is said that her husband is a wealthy businessman. Now that the children are at school, they have nothing to do at home. When they come out to study, they can find something to do for themselves. It can be seen from the clothes she wears that the conditions at home are very good. We classify her as another person. After all, she doesn't have to study hard to face the future employment pressure.
I slowly observed that although Maggie had no employment goal, she was never late or absent from school. Her notes are so neat and detailed that even students who don't attend class borrow them to copy them. Back to the dormitory, girls' night chats must be without beautiful women. A classmate introduced a very abnormal way to wash your face and get rid of acne. How much salt water is mixed with water, how many times you rub it on their cheeks, foreheads and noses, and then your face will be smooth. All of us laughed and said it was abnormal. But I found that Maggie got up earlier than usual the next day and washed her face for a long time. A week later, Maggie told us excitedly that the method of washing her face was really useful, and the acne on her face went down! We all forgot that we said we would wash our faces ... Oh, I suddenly realized that Maggie always takes the tips taught by the teacher seriously in every class. She has always been the most loyal practitioner.
A month later, the school held an American prose recitation competition, which was divided into three rounds. The first round is to select 1 recitation, the second round is to draw lots to select 1 recitation from the specified 1 recitation, and the third round is to draw lots to select1recitation from the specified 20 articles. Of the 60 students in our class, 20 took part in the competition, but most of them didn't. First, I feel that this will not help much in employment, and second, I feel that my English is average and I will definitely be PK. We thought to ourselves, "Since we can't win the prize, there is no need to participate." No one is really interested except the person who has achieved the best.
To our surprise, Maggie also attended. We all think her English level is average. However, she prepared very carefully and asked foreign teachers to help correct her pronunciation. She showed everyone every paragraph she recited, and with the encouragement of her classmates, she recited it with more spirit. To our surprise, Maggie was finally recognized by the judges and entered the second round of the competition with two other students and three people who were the best in English in the class. The other two people, one who is studying abroad hates rote memorization and doesn't prepare 10 designated articles, and the other is famous for his hard work. He not only recited 10 articles, but also prepared 20 articles for the third round in advance. Maggie is different from them. She still appreciates and learns half. She said that the more she read, the more beautiful English she felt. It doesn't matter if she can't recite it, but that feeling makes her feel beautiful. By the day of the competition, Maggie had only memorized four and a half articles. But she is still happy to take part in the competition. The article she prepared was not drawn, so she asked the teacher, "Teacher, I'm sorry I didn't recite this article, but I especially like another article. Can I recite it to you? " The teacher agreed, and when she was full of feelings, she recited the poem ... she was intoxicated as if no one else existed, which was beautiful.
And I stood by and watched the game from beginning to end. I can't help asking myself, if I don't spend time evaluating and watching, can I do it? From then on I began to understand why some people are always so excellent.
Interesting mental model and boring mental model
The mental model of "interesting" people is like this.
No wonder some people are always happy and passionate. Put your heart and soul into them. If you succeed, you will get results. If you fail, you will get wisdom. Whenever you are in the process, you will get happiness! Why don't they invest? They have this mental model.
Adventure? -Investment!
Dedication is the key to loving life. What is happiness? Is to do things quickly and happily!
I am leading a team to start a business myself, and I am also a career planner. I need to find the best talent. So I have a principle when recruiting: I will try my best to challenge them. If the salary was low, would you do it?
I would rather choose those who are not the best in ability but accept low salary, and give up those who are the best in ability but can't afford low salary. Because people who don't care about money often feel that as long as they can do this job, it is their greatest reward. In fact, when a person does something for the sake of the job itself rather than the salary after work, he can often do the job best and will certainly get the most reward.
And the pattern of "boring" people is like this.
No wonder those idle people can never find real interest! Because I am afraid that I will get nothing if I work hard, I don't invest at all! People who don't invest and have low investment have no fun, and it is difficult to have results. There is no gain inside or outside. They don't want to face this fact, so they say to themselves, "I'm not interested." It's better than saying to yourself, "My ability is too poor". Be good.
Slowly, this model will be simplified to:
New things? I'm not interested!
When a person begins to prevaricate by "not interested in life", life begins to lose interest in him.
This is an interesting person who has gained a lot both spiritually and materially. Bored people are poor in spirit and material.
Bored people are often cowards.
Why do you like surfing the Internet so much?
What else can I do in this damn university besides surfing the Internet?
I heard that you like reading. Why don't you study?
Because ... because the library is too far away and inconvenient.
It's said that Internet cafes seem a little farther than libraries.
Oh, this is ... actually, I don't like reading that much.
Do you have any other interests?
I prefer street dance.
I see. I heard that the school's street dance team is well trained. Many students from other schools come here to study. Why don't you have a try?
I know the street dance team, but I practice too late every night, which affects my study.
I heard that you often surf the Internet until three o'clock in the evening, which seems a little later than street dance.
..... Yes, actually I don't like hip-hop.
So what do you like?
What else can I do in this damn university besides surfing the Internet?
This is a conversation between me and an Internet addiction college student. When a person feels that he has no ability to invest in new things, or is afraid that he can't do it well. They will show indifference to new things.
Busy husbands are "not interested" in housework performance, often because they have no time to invest, or they will be scolded by their wives no matter what they do;
Your mother is "not interested" in how to use the computer, perhaps because they think they can't use the computer well, or because you make them feel stupid;
Old people are "not interested" in anything because they feel that they are not competent enough, or that young people are not as good at anything;
Children are "not interested" in learning, often because they feel that they have no ability to learn well, or they can't meet their parents' requirements no matter how hard they try;
Graduates are "not interested" in their jobs, in fact, they feel that they have no ability to make money, or they are afraid that no matter how hard they try, they will not achieve their satisfactory goals;
When friends say that they are "not interested" in love, they actually feel that they are not good enough, or they are afraid that they will fail if they are involved in love.
But no one wants to say that I am afraid, so they lie to themselves and say that I am not interested at all!
They are not lacking in ability, nor are they lacking in opportunities. What they lack is investment, investment in things that don't know the result!
Bored people are often not incompetent people, but cowards.
So ask yourself every day, are you not interested or afraid of being interested?
Life is like a mirror. An interesting person keeps a high degree of devotion to life, embraces life with all his might, and life embraces him with all his might. A boring person isolates himself from life by "not interested", so life avoids him.