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What to do on what occasions.
This is a great harvest of my holiday, from the boss of an educational institution. During the holiday, I took two days off to attend a holiday training class in an English training institution. At first, the lecturer shared this sentence with us seriously because the members were not very familiar with each other and were very cautious.
I think these scenes are familiar to us:
In a quiet classroom, teachers ask questions on the platform or invite students to interact actively on the platform. Many people will be timid, afraid that they will always be embarrassed if they don't perform well.
The school will hold some sports competitions. Some students obviously have the ability, but they never take the initiative to sign up. They often wait until their eyes are wide open and have to draw lots to decide who will play. After they play, they dare not give full play, for fear that being too rude will affect their image.
Students in China seem to be particularly afraid of showing themselves in public, which I have learned deeply in my study career. It seems that there is always a fear of "head shots" in my heart. Even many times, students who show strong interest in learning will be ridiculed as "good students" and become a mockery of "you are just a nerd".
This reminds me of the workers in Hawthorne's experiment. In order to protect the interests of their inefficient peers, the daily workload of workers will all slow down after reaching a certain amount, and no one will break through the initiative, because if you do so, it is equivalent to betraying the team, and anyone who exceeds the average performance will be condemned. However, as students, why don't we dare to show ourselves and show our Excellence to everyone?
Afraid of ruining the image is too rude to play ball?
Afraid of being humiliated by others and afraid to share your answers and ideas?
Afraid of being labeled as a nerd and a good baby, afraid to show enthusiasm for learning?
The reason why you are worried is because you don't understand this sentence: what to do on what occasion.
In the sports field, you are an athlete, and grabbing the ball, defending and shooting are all things you should do. What you want to show is a strong spirit that can oppress your opponent and infect your teammates' confidence. When you try your best to run on the court, the reaction of people off the court is admiration and admiration for you, because at this time you are an athlete who can bring honor to the team.
In the classroom, we are students studying. Listening to lectures, answering questions and participating in interaction are what we have to do. Otherwise, what would you do?
A. Dare is more important than doing.
Without a "dare" heart, how can we act? When you see the speech contest, you look at the registration form and think about whether you are worried about this or that. In the end, there was no breakthrough, and it was a pity to watch others show their passion on the stage. Dare to break through your psychological barriers and encourage you to take the first step out of your comfort zone. I have talked about the relationship between id, superego and ego in previous articles. When either the id or the superego is in a prominent position, after a period of time, the strength of the other party will shrink and weaken. If you stay in your comfort zone for a long time and keep your "dare" ability in your heart, it will become more and more difficult for you to take a long-term view.
B. Process and results
The lecturer asked us, "Is the process important or the result important?"
Some people say the result, others say the process. You said the result was very important, didn't you seem too competitive? Is the process not important? Many people say to enjoy the process. But when you say that the process is important, don't you forget the purpose of your participation in this competition?
The answer is naturally "the process is as important as the result".
But the lecturer's explanation also taught us a lot: before the result is undecided, the result is as important as the process, and you should have the goal of winning, but when the process is over, the result is no longer very important.
I want to share this mode of thinking with you. When we decide to do something and accept a peach fight, we just need to set a goal for ourselves and rush towards it. Don't say from the beginning that the result is not important, but the process. In fact, you just set a limit for your own psychology and lowered your expectations. You're just making excuses for your poor performance. This is a sign of lack of confidence.
C. What is the most important thing after "dare" and "do"
The last point is to share with you where we should put the results before and after the process begins. What I want to tell you is a state of mind about the result. Good doesn't mean getting carried away, and bad doesn't mean depression.
After the results come out, what we have to do is to find out the valuable information for your continuous growth, especially when you fail. Many times, we don't even have to wait until we fail to learn. Look at the people around you, look at the people who have experienced before. The place where they fall is the place where you should jump carefully. As long as you are careful and patient enough, you will grow faster than the people around you, and your detour will be greatly shortened.
For people who keep falling, the most important thing is not to move on, but to stop and find the reason and check the equipment. Then, it takes more courage to dare to stop than to move on. Many people are always afraid that they will fall behind others if they are a little slower.
D. continuity
In the process of training, we all admire the lecturer's speaking ability, oral expression ability and self-confidence on the stage. With the encouragement of the teachers, we gradually let go of ourselves and dared to break through the first time to express ourselves at the front desk and show ourselves in front of our classmates. Seeing this progress, the lecturer also reminded us: "Doing it once is a good start, but if the interval between standing on the stage is too long, you will still shell out" because he himself was the same when he started trying. Once he leaves this experience for a period of time, we will be unfamiliar with what we are familiar with. Therefore, we should maintain a continuity, turn what was originally a challenge into a habit, and you will feel stronger and more confident, because it is as simple as eating and bathing for others.
What to do on what occasions.
Use this sentence to encourage yourself when you are timid.
Qingge had a good holiday. What about you?