In my opinion, there is no such thing as going back to a small city, just thinking about it. Right? It's just a matter of brain control. And only thinking, thinking, is really the answer from the heart. Far more powerful than it should be.
I remember I had such a struggle around 2009. I was 30 years old at that time, but I was still alive. No house, no car, no money, no date. I feel that life in Shanghai is very hard. So, I thought of going back to my hometown in Hunan, the city I know, the people I know, the smells I know and the friends I know, all of which are much closer to my parents. Will this life make me feel happier? After a long struggle, I decided to go back. I got a job in Changsha, lived in my best friend's house and lived with her. All this seems to be much more comfortable than being alone in Shanghai.
However, I still feel a little inexplicably depressed and unhappy. I always feel that this is not the life I want. But I can't find out what the problem is. Later, I talked to a friend of the opposite sex about this topic. His words woke me up in an instant. He said: close to home, far from home. Close to the centrifugal field, far from home. What a classic and wise sentence. Let me instantly understand why I am still unhappy in such a familiar and happy environment. It turned out that it was this familiar person and relationship that put many invisible shackles on my heart. It's suffocating. Just like a fish that used to swim happily and freely in the sea, it was suddenly put into a small fish tank. You will feel that you have lost your freedom and are bound everywhere.
I share my personal experience and feelings with you, just to make you take fewer detours. Always listen to your inner voice. Instead of being at the mercy of your brain or following the advice of your friends and relatives. Because, in the end, you can only pay for this decision.
About the author: Ziyun, accompany you to see life, the world and yourself from the perspective of a psychological counselor. Personal WeChat official account: her independent garden