Competition method Parents can seize their children's competitive psychology and have a "competition" with their children to see who can do it quickly and well. For example, children are often reluctant to brush their teeth when they get up in the morning. At this time, you can tell your child that we will have a brushing competition to see who brushes well and quickly. Children often take part in the competition happily. Of course, at the beginning of the "competition", parents should intentionally let their children get sex, so as to build their confidence in continuing to do it.
The characters (animals) in stories are often "idols" that children imitate or worship. Therefore, parents can provide their children with "idols" to imitate by telling stories, and guide their children to learn from the characters (animals) in the stories and be good children who understand the truth.
The game method can accomplish what children are required to do through games. For example, if a child refuses to recognize numbers, distinguish colors and count, parents may wish to play games with their children, such as playing with building blocks, patting a ball, drawing, skipping rope, etc., and educate the child in the game and guide him to complete related learning tasks.
Choice method When something must be done but the child refuses to do it, the choice method can be used. The so-called choice is to let the children choose whether to do it first or later, whether to do it immediately or later, rather than whether to do it or not: for example, if the children's hair grows, they refuse to get a haircut, and parents don't have to force it. They can say in a consultative tone, "Do you cut first or shall I cut first?" Children often answer: "You take care of it first." After the parents cut their hair, the children had to leave it alone.
Transfer method children are disobedient, and sometimes they can use transfer method to transfer their attention and interest. For example, when children see a toy, they clamor to buy it, but adults think they should not buy it. What should you do? At this time, parents can adopt the "transfer method", that is, they don't talk to their children about whether to buy this toy, and unconsciously divert their attention to make them forget his idea of buying a toy.
Knowing the scientific methods of disciplining children and skillfully using them will make them "obedient".
1, change the mode: don't force the baby to do what you say. You can give your baby a choice. If the baby should go to bed, but the baby stays up late. In this case, you can set two options: (1) "It's time for you to go to bed, ok?" (2) "don't you sleep? Mom is going to bed, and mom is going to turn off the lights. Will you go to the living room to play by yourself? " Generally, babies will choose according to their temperament, but it doesn't matter. As long as parents keep their promises, the baby will accept the advice of adults when summing up the failed choices.
2. Appropriate neutralization: If it is not a key issue or an important decision, parents can discuss with the baby when the baby is unwilling to determine a compromise plan to satisfy both parties. For example, what to do before going out; What to eat ..... It's more valuable to let a three-or four-year-old baby participate in the discussion than to make him obey. Even if the baby's opinion is not suitable, you might as well listen to his opinion and guide him to form experience through decision-making mistakes in order to achieve guided growth.
3, adhere to the principle: in the face of right and wrong, the baby is not obedient, and the adults do not give in, which will be more conducive to the baby's education. For example, cheating in public, going out as a guest is unruly and affecting other people's life activities. As long as the baby violates the prior agreement, parents can use methods such as interrupting activities and taking them away from the scene to let the baby experience the consequences of not complying with the agreement. However, parents should remember that they should make an agreement with their baby in advance for possible and recurring problems, so that the baby can be psychologically prepared and have a comparison in behavior, so that the baby can accept the opinions of adults convincingly.
What if the child doesn't listen? As the saying goes, seven or eight is too many. At this time, the child is curious and wants to make up his own mind. Give it a try, the rebellious mentality is gradually strengthening to meet their psychological needs. In this case, we can start from the following points:
First, treat it calmly. When the child loses his temper and plays tricks on him, leave him alone in a room for a while. Don't rush to convince him. Soon, he will be quiet. Reasoning with him at this time, he will accept it.
Second, proper experience, sometimes the way children solve problems is not correct. At this time, adults might as well let him try, there is no danger. When he hits a wall, give him a reason and he will be willing to accept it.
Third, communication, when a child does something wrong, don't just blame him, but ask him patiently why he did it, and help him analyze the consequences of doing it, so that he can realize the seriousness and learn how to solve such problems and adjust his emotions in the future.
Fourth, timely encouragement, encouragement is a good medicine for any naughty child. When he finds that he has made a little progress, he should encourage praise and give him confidence, and he will consciously restrain his behavior, constantly strengthen and gradually change his bad habits.
5. The role of role models can tell children stories of celebrities who have been obedient since childhood, and let them tell what you know from the stories. You can also take obedient children around your children as role models to guide them to follow the characters in the stories and the children around them, and be a sensible child.
One of the most common educational expressions that children in China have heard since childhood is that children should listen to adults. Parents are most dissatisfied when children are disobedient. In a word, obedience seems to be the highest standard of "good boy". Because of this, the most obvious shortcoming of children in China is their lack of independence and creativity.
From the perspective of modern educational concept, it is obviously a misunderstanding to take "obedience" as the goal of educating children, which is not conducive to the development of children's personality and the stimulation of their potential. In a sense, a child who is too obedient may be "problem children".
Why do you say "obedient" children are "problem children"? After a little observation, we can find that "obedient" children who are most praised by adults are often timid and rarely have their own different opinions. But not saying it doesn't mean that there are no different opinions. It's just that such children are better at suppressing themselves, and even if they have problems in their hearts, they don't argue with their elders. Some children behave like a good boy who is particularly obedient and disciplined in kindergarten or school. They rarely resist their parents at home and are used to being praised and praised by people around them. But they are often the most vulnerable to criticism from others.
Preschool children have a certain sense of independence and have their own ideas about everything. At this time, they should not unilaterally emphasize that children should be obedient, but should also listen to them more. Although adults are experienced, they also have many one-sided and wrong understandings. Communicate with children equally and think more about whether children have their own reasons. Parents should also convince others by reasoning, not oppress others by force. Don't force your child to do anything you say just because you are a parent. Give the child a chance to think and talk and convince him.
In fact, only emphasizing "obedience" is easy to cultivate children's servility, making them have no independence, lacking personal opinions on all issues, unable to fight evil forces, and even leading to personality distortion due to long-term repression. There are also such examples in life. A recognized "good man" actually committed suicide or embarked on the road of crime. They often evolve from "problem children" to "problem adults", which further shows that this problem is as terrible as latent cancer and should be paid great attention to.
Mr Tao Xingzhi, an educator, once had "six propositions". He put forward: "Emancipate children's thoughts from morality, prejudice and fantasy; Emancipate the child's hands from the bondage of' don't move here, don't move there'; Liberate children's mouths, let them have the freedom to ask questions, and liberate themselves from "few words"; Liberate children's space, let them contact with nature and society, and liberate them from birdcage-like schools; The time to liberate children is not too tight, and they are liberated from the excessive examination system; Give democratic life and conscious discipline and teach students in accordance with their aptitude. " His views are very incisive.
Untie the knot in parents' hearts
First of all, children are disobedient: a knotty knot in parents' hearts.
Children's disobedience is a headache for many parents. However, many parents can't find the root of the problem. In fact, only by finding the root cause of children's disobedience can we find the corresponding solution. Otherwise, if you just have a headache or even go to the hospital in a hurry, it will be difficult to solve the problem.
1. Children's disobedience is a big worry for parents.
Children's disobedience is a reflection of their rebellious psychology.
3. Treating children's disobedience scientifically is divided into two parts.
4. Children's excessive disobedience is a manifestation of mental health.
You can't let your child's excessive disobedience go unchecked.
6. Be a good life mentor for children and guide them to grow up healthily.
Second, the various manifestations of children's excessive disobedience
Children's disobedience is always associated with inner thoughts. If parents want to completely correct their children's disobedience, they must go deep into their children's hearts and talk to them attentively, so as to really influence their children and make them consciously change.
1. willfulness: do whatever you want.
2. Fun: I really want to have enough fun at once.
3. Tired of learning: I am tired of seeing textbooks.
4. Conceit: think too highly of yourself and look down on others.
Third, parents are to blame for children's disobedience.
Parents should reflect on themselves while trying their best to correct their children's disobedience. In the process of educating children, are there any improper things, excessive behaviors, tests on children's understanding and acceptance, etc. Only by finding out the shortcomings of our own education can we foster strengths and avoid weaknesses, and find a scientific solution to children's disobedience from both children and ourselves.
1. Love without education: dote on children and be responsive.
2. Go with the flow: believe that trees are natural and straight.
3. Sensitive period: navigation will not be conducted during this navigation.
4. Expectations are too high: immature shoulders are overwhelmed.
5. Rough snoring: The child is physically and mentally exhausted.
6. Family breakdown: the child's heart injury is difficult to heal.
7. External pollution: lack of prevention and guidance.
Fourth, the right medicine: the general countermeasures for children's disobedience
Disobedience is a unique psychological phenomenon of children and an inevitable physiological phenomenon. Parents need not worry about it. As long as parents find the root of their children's disobedience and guide them correctly with scientific tutoring art, they can turn their children's disobedience into a driving force for learning and progress and promote their healthy growth.
1. The most fundamental thing is to stimulate children's self-motivation and curiosity.
2. Set an example: Parents should set an example for their children.
3. Persuasion is better than coercion: don't force children.
4. Correct the child's shortcomings by affirming the advantages.
5. Respect children and be their bosom friends.
6. Appreciate children properly: let children feel valued.
7. Moderate punishment: too much is not enough.
8. Gradually enhance children's self-management ability.
How to effectively educate disobedient children
First, the spring breeze turns to rain: correcting children's rebellious and rebellious psychology
For rebellious children, parents should always keep in touch with them and urge them to pour out their thoughts and feelings. Then, through persuasion, suit the remedy to the case, guide the children to the right path of life.
1. Resolving the rebellion in children's hearts is nothing more than a temporary solution.
2. Active guidance: let children vent their emotions.
3. Understanding and caring: reducing children's psychological burden
4. Facing the "generation gap" conflict, solve it in the right way.
5. Treat children as equals and let them move from confrontation to happy cooperation.
6. Respect children's privacy and don't interfere with children's legal rights.
7. Get rid of the high-pressure policy and listen to the children's voices.
8. Teach children to treat and accept teachers' criticism correctly.
9. Help children eliminate teachers' misunderstanding of themselves.
10. Eliminate children's resistance to teachers in time.
1 1. Guide children not to taste the bitter fruit of puppy love.
12. Don't tolerate children's disrespect for their elders.
Second, temper justice with mercy: change the child's bad personality.
For wayward children, on the one hand, parents should strictly control his unreasonable waywardness and nonsense, on the other hand, they should adopt the strategy of tolerance and guidance for his reasonable self-assertion, which is the educational method of combining leniency with severity.
1. Parents indulge their children, which will lead to their willfulness.
2. Don't accommodate your child's unreasonable demands.
3. Cultivate children's self-control and correct their unreasonable troubles.
Don't let the child cry to achieve his goal.
Don't let children neglect discipline.
6. What if children don't accept criticism from their parents?
7. Correct the child's bad habit of losing his temper
8. Change children's unreasonable attitude.
9. Correct children's bad habit of asking for things at random.
10. Resolutely correct children's self-centered psychology
1 1. Help children to know themselves correctly and overcome their conceit.
12. Don't make your child arrogant: "I'm just better than others!"
13. Don't let children be too narrow-minded: "I can do it, others can't!"
14. Correct the shortcomings that children do wrong and refuse to admit.
Third, relax moderately: methods and skills to overcome children's playfulness
If parents want to change their children's playfulness, they must first identify the crux of their children's playfulness, and then adopt correct educational methods. Under the dual role of guidance and compulsion, relaxation and moderation have changed children's bad habit of being playful and put them on the right track.
1. Guide children to play sometimes, with restraint and restraint.
2. Restrain naughty children with proper rules.
3. Follow the trend: develop the intelligent potential of "naughty bag"
4. Cleverly stipulate the study time of naughty children
5. Correct the children's failure to finish their homework on time.
6. Don't just focus on yourself and leave the children to the TV.
7. Don't indulge your children to have fun during the holidays.
8. Exercise the patience of naughty children with "three-minute training".
9. Never let children get lost in video games.
10. Save the children who are addicted to the Internet
1 1. Don't forbid children to play normally.
Fourth, comprehensive management: correct children's weariness of learning.
Parents should study and analyze the root causes of children's weariness of learning according to their children's reality, so as to suit the remedy to the case and be targeted. Experts believe that correcting children's weariness of learning requires comprehensive management, and multi-pronged approach from all aspects is the key to help children raise their ideal sails and establish self-confidence in becoming talents.
1. Let children raise their ideal sails and cross the swamp that is tired of learning.
2. Build self-confidence for children who are tired of learning and find the correct life coordinates.
3. Guide children to change their "headache" impression of learning.
4. Don't put too much pressure on children.
5. Eliminate children's psychology that "teachers don't like me"
6. Guide children to gamify learning and turn hard study into interesting study.
7. Make learning fresh: stimulate children's interest in learning by drawing lots.
8. Leverage third parties: urge and urge children through others.
9. Use the power of example: Let children make more friends with excellent classmates.
10. Wake up children who are tired of learning: wake up thinking with thinking.
1 1. Use rebellious psychology to deliberately stimulate children.
12. urge children to change from wasting time to cherishing time like gold.
13. Promote the change of children from partial subjects to all-round development with a wise attitude.
Fifth, make up: correct the child's bad habits.
To overcome children's bad behavior habits, we should not take rude "beating, scolding and punishing", but should patiently guide children to obey and consciously develop good habits. Only by educating their children to start with trivial matters of life, distinguish right from wrong, adhere to correct and correct wrong habits, can children embark on the society with a good mental outlook and become educated people.
1. Bad habits are invisible shackles that bind children.
2. Correct children's bad habits of picky eaters and partial eclipse.
3. Reject the child's "gluttony": Don't let him "eat at once"
4. Correct the child's habit of not cleaning.
5. Don't let your child sleep for a while: correct the bad habit of staying in bed.
6. Life lies in exercise: change children's habit of not exercising.
7. Correct the child's love of pretending to be sick: "I have a headache and can't go to school!"
8. Eliminate language rubbish: Don't let children curse all over the sky.
9. Take precautions: Take children's stealing seriously.
10. Be careful that your child will become a "just one puff" little smoker.
1 1. Gambling harms others and harms oneself: Never let children become small gamblers.
12. Correct children's bad habit of making trouble in public places.
13. Change the child's boast: "I know everything!"
14. Correct the crazy idolization of children: "I love F4!"
15. cleanliness: correct children's procrastination.
16. Don't let the children with poor learning jingle.
17. Correct the child's bad habit of being impolite.
18. Guide children to correct scrawled handwriting neatly and clearly.
19. Resolutely correct children's bad habits of cheating in exams.
20. Resolutely correct the bad habit of children hitting people.
Six, stay away from the devil: drive away the child's spiritual shadow.
As parents, we should be alert to and attach great importance to children's bad emotions, create a healthy atmosphere conducive to their growth, enhance their psychological endurance, and cultivate their optimistic, positive and upward healthy mentality. Parents should know that cultivating children's mental health is even more important than cultivating children's physical health. Only when children have a healthy psychology can they challenge the future and succeed.
1. Light the fire of hope and guide children out of the whirlpool of depression and emptiness.
2. Drive away the demons that plague children and help them overcome anxiety.
Don't be afraid of the exam! Help children overcome exam anxiety
4. Guide children to overcome gloomy mood: get out of the quagmire of melancholy.
5. Melt indifference and strengthen children's "enthusiastic" behavior.
6. dispel doubts in children's minds: guide children to overcome paranoia
7. If you fall, you must get up: treating children's frustration syndrome.
8. Don't ignore children's self-destruction: warn children of self-abuse behavior.
9. Don't let your child's naive nature get lost: help your child overcome vanity.
10. Eliminate children's jealousy of others.
1 1. Deal with it rationally and remove the violent tendency in children's thoughts.